swinging community - What Might I disLike About Swinging?
....If you are a single male, you might actually be better off waiting
until you are in a suitable relationship before attempting to become active
in swinging - most swing clubs allow few if any single men to attend their
events . . . .we do though . . . .
If you are uncomfortable with people being sexually
attracted to you and/or flirting with you, then you might be uncomfortable
at swinging events; similarly, if your relationship with your partner
is on shaky ground, you might find seeing him or her flirt or be
flirted with to be an uncomfortable experience. If either of you
have hidden agendas concerning finding a permanent "replacement"
for each other, you're probably in for a major emotional disaster.
If you and your partner cannot communicate directly about relationships
and sex, you're probably eventually in for a similarly-sized disaster.
In general, sex can provoke strong feelings along with its many
pleasures; if you aren't comfortable dealing with emotions, then
perhaps it might be better to wait a little while before exploring
If you are bothered by seeing people have sex without
condoms, then you might want to avoid some of the larger play areas
in many on-premises swinger's events. Although I have never run
into a situation in the swinging community where my requests to
use latex were looked down on in any way, it is certainly true that
not all on-premises clubs require the use of safer sex precautions.
Depending on your experience with sex-positive communities other
than swinging, seeing others not use latex may be unsettling to
you. You should know what your own standards are with regard to
safer sex, and be willing to articulate them to new people or couples
you are about to have sex with. If your personal safer sex standards
include using barriers for cunnilingus, then you should be prepared
to do some explaining as not everyone will be familiar with this
If you are offended by phobia against bi men, then
you should be prepared to either look for a club that is more open-minded
on this particular issue, wait for attitudes in the community to
change (which I believe may happen in the next five years or so),
or else attend anyway and make a point of not letting small-minded
comments go unchallenged.
If you are a single male, you might actually be
better off waiting until you are in a suitable relationship before
attempting to become active in swinging - most swing clubs allow
few if any single men to attend their events.
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